What should I talk about today?
I was told by my Grad School Advisor (the new one) that I need to concentrate on positive points I can change. It's hard for my to stay positive these days. I just look at my ill-equipped classes in the Room From Hell. Or I look at the broken copier - one of two in the building - that has been out for 4 days. Or I see another standardized test where my students are removed from the room on the schedule and I found out about it 3 days prior. Or I look at the benchmarks coming up where I have to teach the students insane amounts of materials... and if they don't make the grade then my job is threatened.
I can't see the positive. My students just got the book. Most of them don't bring theirs to class. Most of them have almost no background in science. I'm supposed to teach them when most of my students have issues understanding what an atom is - and I get to teach them about hydrogen bonding between proteins. I have to teach them genetics and they don't understand what a cell is. Most of them make it a point to say that they "don't care" and will not nor will they ever do this thing called studying. The district tells me that I can't assign so many F's but the kids have to pass the benchmark.
I'm surrounded by impossible demands.
I don't know how other teachers handle all of this.
What's worse... it's hard for me to see the positive side of teaching at all right now. I don't like teaching and I'm not having fun. When does this get better?
Sorry for the depressing post, but it's how I feel right now. Sure, I'll focus on the positives. I have a job. That's a positive. I like most of my students. That's a positive. I want so much better for them. That's a positive.