Interactive Notebooks: Day 5
I told my students that I was collecting the notebooks today to grade them. Suddenly, there was a flurry of activity while they all rushed to get done a whole week's worth of work instead of working on the activity for today. I think that in the future I'm going to say that there will be one check per week but it will be random. That will save me a lot of fuss and trouble.
Also, it doesn't really help me to have my students not paying attention to me because they're worried about their grade for the previous stuff. Whether they realize it or not, I'm more worried about working with them on *today's* materials so that they can ask me for help or remediation when I'm *there* and can help them.
So far, I'm not too impressed with the Interactive Notebook's ability to help my students retain material because they're not invested in them. However, as an assessment tool - they're stellar. I can grade them in about 1 minute and the students can easily see exactly what they are missing. They're fantastic in that regard!
Friday, January 29, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Interactive Notebooks Day 4
Interactive Notebooks Day 4
The kids are not getting the concepts this time around. I'm having trouble (still) getting them to understand and retain transcription and translation. Grades are coming out soon and I'm a little worried.
I delayed a day longer to try and reteach the material, but now I'm moving on to other things I need to cover before the kids take their district-required tests to see if they've learned what the district says they're supposed to learn by this point in the school year. Yippie. -_-
On the upside - this method of teaching is making it really easy for me to tell when a student is missing work. They ask me their grade, and I say "Open your notebook and show me all of the finished activities for the past 4 days." They say "oh crap!" and I say... "yeah, get those done."
The kids are not getting the concepts this time around. I'm having trouble (still) getting them to understand and retain transcription and translation. Grades are coming out soon and I'm a little worried.
I delayed a day longer to try and reteach the material, but now I'm moving on to other things I need to cover before the kids take their district-required tests to see if they've learned what the district says they're supposed to learn by this point in the school year. Yippie. -_-
On the upside - this method of teaching is making it really easy for me to tell when a student is missing work. They ask me their grade, and I say "Open your notebook and show me all of the finished activities for the past 4 days." They say "oh crap!" and I say... "yeah, get those done."
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Teacher, research your pupils, Part I
Update: Using my students as research subjects...
As a caveat of my Transition to Teaching (TM) program, I need to go to graduate school and get my Master's in Education before 2 years is up. For people that don't have an education degree that go into teaching, the state is vary wary. Apparently, it was brought up that without a degree in education that these career professionals could be doing horrible damage to the kiddies without realizing.
Now, I've always been a fan of learning. I've always loved school. That's part of the reason why I went into teaching to begin with. Also, I really hated research. Talk about boring and monotonous. (This is where I hear the Chinese curse: "May you live in interesting times," floating through my head.)
My love of education stopped at graduate school, Education Degree Version.
Suffice it to say that I'm not impressed with the learning going on in these classes. My latest rant is that of the quality of their research. It's called "Action Research." The action, apparently, is to test an idea without controls and relevant statistics.
High horse time: I was a cancer researcher in my former life. It pains me on an almost physical level to write a graduate thesis about my "research" without controls or statistics guiding the way. I've been been great at statistics, but programs are built for people like me that get mixed up on when to use a T test versus ANOVA versus a regression analysis. Yay for computers to think for me!
I'm just sayin'. Um... how can you ever say that what you proved was because of your hypothesis and not just a random pattern?
As a caveat of my Transition to Teaching (TM) program, I need to go to graduate school and get my Master's in Education before 2 years is up. For people that don't have an education degree that go into teaching, the state is vary wary. Apparently, it was brought up that without a degree in education that these career professionals could be doing horrible damage to the kiddies without realizing.
Now, I've always been a fan of learning. I've always loved school. That's part of the reason why I went into teaching to begin with. Also, I really hated research. Talk about boring and monotonous. (This is where I hear the Chinese curse: "May you live in interesting times," floating through my head.)
My love of education stopped at graduate school, Education Degree Version.
Suffice it to say that I'm not impressed with the learning going on in these classes. My latest rant is that of the quality of their research. It's called "Action Research." The action, apparently, is to test an idea without controls and relevant statistics.
High horse time: I was a cancer researcher in my former life. It pains me on an almost physical level to write a graduate thesis about my "research" without controls or statistics guiding the way. I've been been great at statistics, but programs are built for people like me that get mixed up on when to use a T test versus ANOVA versus a regression analysis. Yay for computers to think for me!
I'm just sayin'. Um... how can you ever say that what you proved was because of your hypothesis and not just a random pattern?
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Medical Emergency
Special Update: Medical Emergency
One of my students last period had an accident and had to be taken to the Emergency Room. I have no idea what happened, as my back was turned to him for half a minute, but as I was quieting my last class of the day to get ready for announcements I saw them all back up quickly and fearfully like they'd seen a mouse.
I turned around expecting a mouse, and say one of the students on the floor. As I was opening my mouth to say his name, he opened his mouth and started spitting up blood. Lots of blood. And 2 teeth.
I quickly helped him up and got him to a chair with some paper towels to catch the blood falling out of his mouth. He covered my floor with spatters of spit blood for 3 feet. There was so much blood that it was coagulating in big clumps as it sat there.
I shooed the students out of the room and into the hallway, ran and got the nurse that teaches next door, and then tried to comfort my student. I had trouble with that. What do you say when one of your students has 2 of his teeth - root and all - laying in a puddle of blood on the floor? Really, "they can put them back in," sounds lame and "it's going to be OK," sounds trite.
I just settled for hugging him and telling him that his family would be with him soon and that he was going to see a doctor that would make it ok.
When the school nurse got there with gauze and other medical supplies, I backed up and let her do her thing. Medically trained, I am not thought I have an interest in the subject. Trying to be useful, I got the cops (who were coming in the door) the students emergency contacts and updated everyone on what I knew, though it was precious little.
However, I did send one of the cops for some milk. I said that we needed to get his teeth into milk as soon as possible so they could put them back in for him at the hospital. The cops went running to the cafeteria and came back with the milk in 5 minutes. Until then, we wrapped the teeth in wet paper towel. Once the teeth were in the milk, the EMTs arrived from the ambulance waiting outside. I wrote the exact time his teeth had come out on the carten of milk in permanent marker and made sure to show the EMTs the information so they could show the doctor.
Of the two EMTs, the taller man looked at me with a smile and said "I thought that was an old-wives tale, but OK." I seriously could have punched him. In the face. Hard.
I almost started crying when my administrator said that he had to go with my student to the hospital and not me. I wanted to stay with him and make sure he was safe until his family came to his side. He knows me. I could have comforted him when he was the most scared. He doesn't know the Academic Dean of our Magnet that well. He knows me and trusts me.
In the end, I told him that he would be OK and that the EMTs would make sure everything would be alright (which I doubted but kept to myself). Once he'd left, I had 3 students come walking in for after-school tutoring and stop at the sight of all the blood. I think he lost a little less than a pint on my floor, desks, stools, and walls.
I told them to wait in the office until I made the room sterile. They nodded vigorously and left with very wide eyes.
The school nurse, bless her, stayed and helped me clean up the blood. I went to get a gallon of bleach that I keep in the back room and mixed it up for at 70%. My science training came in handy, as I had to memorize how to clean up bio hazard spills as a researcher that handled blood. 70% bleach for at least 30 seconds, then wipe with alcohol after the bleach has dried. It took us almost an hour to get the blood up off the floor.
I was a bit in shock myself, as I just started laughing in the middle of cleaning. It was, apparently, infectious as the nurse started laughing to. I told her that cleaning up blood was "not in my plans for a Tuesday afternoon."
Update: 9PM
I called the boys legal guardian. He lives with his aunt. She told me that they were able to put his teeth back in at the ER. She also told me, which did make me cry, that it was because of me and my quick thinking that they were able to save his teeth. If they hadn't been put in the milk, he would have lost them because it took so long to get him into the ER. The root of the tooth would have died.
He's OK. I didn't realize how scared I was until I talked to his aunt. I apologized to her for not having more information on what happened, but told her everything I'd seen. I told her that tomorrow, I would talk to my students and find out what happened and update her after school. So help me, if anyone hurt that child I will yell at them with an inch of their life. Of course, I'm upset so I probably should calm down first. Never discipline children when angry. Ever. I learned that growing up.
Though, I now understand my mother saying to her children: "If you're OK at the end of this, I'm going to kill you."
One of my students last period had an accident and had to be taken to the Emergency Room. I have no idea what happened, as my back was turned to him for half a minute, but as I was quieting my last class of the day to get ready for announcements I saw them all back up quickly and fearfully like they'd seen a mouse.
I turned around expecting a mouse, and say one of the students on the floor. As I was opening my mouth to say his name, he opened his mouth and started spitting up blood. Lots of blood. And 2 teeth.
I quickly helped him up and got him to a chair with some paper towels to catch the blood falling out of his mouth. He covered my floor with spatters of spit blood for 3 feet. There was so much blood that it was coagulating in big clumps as it sat there.
I shooed the students out of the room and into the hallway, ran and got the nurse that teaches next door, and then tried to comfort my student. I had trouble with that. What do you say when one of your students has 2 of his teeth - root and all - laying in a puddle of blood on the floor? Really, "they can put them back in," sounds lame and "it's going to be OK," sounds trite.
I just settled for hugging him and telling him that his family would be with him soon and that he was going to see a doctor that would make it ok.
When the school nurse got there with gauze and other medical supplies, I backed up and let her do her thing. Medically trained, I am not thought I have an interest in the subject. Trying to be useful, I got the cops (who were coming in the door) the students emergency contacts and updated everyone on what I knew, though it was precious little.
However, I did send one of the cops for some milk. I said that we needed to get his teeth into milk as soon as possible so they could put them back in for him at the hospital. The cops went running to the cafeteria and came back with the milk in 5 minutes. Until then, we wrapped the teeth in wet paper towel. Once the teeth were in the milk, the EMTs arrived from the ambulance waiting outside. I wrote the exact time his teeth had come out on the carten of milk in permanent marker and made sure to show the EMTs the information so they could show the doctor.
Of the two EMTs, the taller man looked at me with a smile and said "I thought that was an old-wives tale, but OK." I seriously could have punched him. In the face. Hard.
I almost started crying when my administrator said that he had to go with my student to the hospital and not me. I wanted to stay with him and make sure he was safe until his family came to his side. He knows me. I could have comforted him when he was the most scared. He doesn't know the Academic Dean of our Magnet that well. He knows me and trusts me.
In the end, I told him that he would be OK and that the EMTs would make sure everything would be alright (which I doubted but kept to myself). Once he'd left, I had 3 students come walking in for after-school tutoring and stop at the sight of all the blood. I think he lost a little less than a pint on my floor, desks, stools, and walls.
I told them to wait in the office until I made the room sterile. They nodded vigorously and left with very wide eyes.
The school nurse, bless her, stayed and helped me clean up the blood. I went to get a gallon of bleach that I keep in the back room and mixed it up for at 70%. My science training came in handy, as I had to memorize how to clean up bio hazard spills as a researcher that handled blood. 70% bleach for at least 30 seconds, then wipe with alcohol after the bleach has dried. It took us almost an hour to get the blood up off the floor.
I was a bit in shock myself, as I just started laughing in the middle of cleaning. It was, apparently, infectious as the nurse started laughing to. I told her that cleaning up blood was "not in my plans for a Tuesday afternoon."
Update: 9PM
I called the boys legal guardian. He lives with his aunt. She told me that they were able to put his teeth back in at the ER. She also told me, which did make me cry, that it was because of me and my quick thinking that they were able to save his teeth. If they hadn't been put in the milk, he would have lost them because it took so long to get him into the ER. The root of the tooth would have died.
He's OK. I didn't realize how scared I was until I talked to his aunt. I apologized to her for not having more information on what happened, but told her everything I'd seen. I told her that tomorrow, I would talk to my students and find out what happened and update her after school. So help me, if anyone hurt that child I will yell at them with an inch of their life. Of course, I'm upset so I probably should calm down first. Never discipline children when angry. Ever. I learned that growing up.
Though, I now understand my mother saying to her children: "If you're OK at the end of this, I'm going to kill you."
Interactive Notebook Research, Day 2
Interactive Notebooks
The students were having trouble today. I think I need to go back and re-teach them the basics of Genetics because so many of them are not getting it. This is going to set me back but I'd rather have them understand the basics well then shallowly understand very little.
Today's activities involved vocabulary matching. Note for next time, if you're going to ask students that never study to match vocabulary words to the correct step in turning DNA in protein, make sure to review the meanings first. Or better yet, have them copy the definitions from the back of the book into their notebook BEFORE the activity. That was my major issue today. The kids kept looking at me with confused looks because they didn't remember what the vocabulary words mean that we worked on last week.
Le sigh.
Hopefully, tomorrow will be better. I'm going to have them work on mini-essays where they summarize the two steps (transcription and translation) and then draw what's happening. Then they're going to underline all the vocab words in the mini-essay. Hopefully, that will make them review and use the material. I hope. Short of making them repeat the words over and over until I force them to memorize them, I don't know what to do to help them get the basics. Understanding is easy. However, they lose their understanding if they don't memorize the basic stuff like vocabulary.
The students were having trouble today. I think I need to go back and re-teach them the basics of Genetics because so many of them are not getting it. This is going to set me back but I'd rather have them understand the basics well then shallowly understand very little.
Today's activities involved vocabulary matching. Note for next time, if you're going to ask students that never study to match vocabulary words to the correct step in turning DNA in protein, make sure to review the meanings first. Or better yet, have them copy the definitions from the back of the book into their notebook BEFORE the activity. That was my major issue today. The kids kept looking at me with confused looks because they didn't remember what the vocabulary words mean that we worked on last week.
Le sigh.
Hopefully, tomorrow will be better. I'm going to have them work on mini-essays where they summarize the two steps (transcription and translation) and then draw what's happening. Then they're going to underline all the vocab words in the mini-essay. Hopefully, that will make them review and use the material. I hope. Short of making them repeat the words over and over until I force them to memorize them, I don't know what to do to help them get the basics. Understanding is easy. However, they lose their understanding if they don't memorize the basic stuff like vocabulary.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Interactive Notebooks: Day 1
Interactive Notebooks: Day 1
I started my graduate research today. I'm studying student retention of concepts. My hypothesis is that if the students take notes in an interactive, creative way that approaches the material from a different way than just seeking to comprehend it that they will remember it better. It should be interesting to see.
I pretested the students on their knowledge of genetics last week. It was a short 3 question test, so it just gave me an idea of how much they understood before we went into the unit on transcription and translation.
Today, I gave the students a questionnaire about how often they took notes in class. We shall see how this works.
I started my graduate research today. I'm studying student retention of concepts. My hypothesis is that if the students take notes in an interactive, creative way that approaches the material from a different way than just seeking to comprehend it that they will remember it better. It should be interesting to see.
I pretested the students on their knowledge of genetics last week. It was a short 3 question test, so it just gave me an idea of how much they understood before we went into the unit on transcription and translation.
Today, I gave the students a questionnaire about how often they took notes in class. We shall see how this works.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Speechless moments
I have no words.
One of my students, C., today was sitting and playing a hand-held game. I asked him if he had his work done and ready to turn in. He didn't look up but told me he left his folder at home.
Except that he has no home. He lives in a group home. I found this out earlier in the week when he got 2 warnings in one day for barking in class (14 year-olds are silly and crazy). Instead of a parent on the other end of the phone, I got a very crisp-voiced professional woman assuring me that his misbavior would be dealt with.
Today, in the middle of class, one of my other students asked me how old I am. I answered and they all laughed and said I looked younger. I laughed and said I got that a lot. C looked up shyly from his game and told me that his mother died when she was 42, 2 years ago.
I had nothing that I could say. It was too painful and I didn't want to draw attention to him. I just put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a gentle squeeze. He looked me in the eyes for a second and withdrew to go back to his game. I walked away to answer another question. This took all of 2 seconds but it will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Somtimes, this job is harder than people think and for reasons impossible to explain without crying.
One of my students, C., today was sitting and playing a hand-held game. I asked him if he had his work done and ready to turn in. He didn't look up but told me he left his folder at home.
Except that he has no home. He lives in a group home. I found this out earlier in the week when he got 2 warnings in one day for barking in class (14 year-olds are silly and crazy). Instead of a parent on the other end of the phone, I got a very crisp-voiced professional woman assuring me that his misbavior would be dealt with.
Today, in the middle of class, one of my other students asked me how old I am. I answered and they all laughed and said I looked younger. I laughed and said I got that a lot. C looked up shyly from his game and told me that his mother died when she was 42, 2 years ago.
I had nothing that I could say. It was too painful and I didn't want to draw attention to him. I just put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a gentle squeeze. He looked me in the eyes for a second and withdrew to go back to his game. I walked away to answer another question. This took all of 2 seconds but it will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Somtimes, this job is harder than people think and for reasons impossible to explain without crying.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Compare to last year
Note to readers: I'm not upset with life. Really.
I think my New Year's Resolution should be to blog every day and not just when I'm so angry or upset that I indulge in BlogRant (tm).
Also... I'm so much better that I was last year at this time. Case in point: we'll compare where I was last year and where I am now. Some positivity is well deserved and might help me to put things in perspective.
Last Year
As Doctor Heal Thyself, so I need to listen to myself more.
I think my New Year's Resolution should be to blog every day and not just when I'm so angry or upset that I indulge in BlogRant (tm).
Also... I'm so much better that I was last year at this time. Case in point: we'll compare where I was last year and where I am now. Some positivity is well deserved and might help me to put things in perspective.
Last Year
- Struggling with how to organize my lessons
- Didn't know how to lesson plan
- Completely made it up as I went along (no planning in advance)
- Reactive discipline instead of preventative procedures
- Was trying to be students' friend instead of Instructor (big issue last year)
- Didn't know how to grade in a timely/effective manner
- Had trouble keeping track of grades
- Never called home
- Periodically had "free days" due to lack of planning
- Still having problems with how to effective keep track of grades
- Still having issues grading quickly and and getting stuff back to the students
- Struggling with classroom management... but SO much better
As Doctor Heal Thyself, so I need to listen to myself more.
Monday, January 11, 2010
What is a teacher to do...
Just when I think I've got control of a situation... it all comes crashing down.
All of the teachers in my building have been told that the students that fail their classes were going to be removed and put into study halls. This was supposedly supposed to give them some time to work on the state standards that they hadn't gotten in their classes. I think it was also to remove the students that were not performing at their ability.
However, this was not done. In fact, with the new students entering my class, my rosters got larger. Combine this with the fact that the students that were failing math and english *did* get removed from those classes and their schedules had to re rearranged. My classes are going nuts.
There are some days where I wonder at the administration. I know that last year that if I have more than 20% of my students failing that we have to justify their grades to the administration and face an inquisition. The administration says their goal is to have 95% of students pass their state standardized tests. I understand their goal, but keeping kids in the same classes even after they have failed isn't helping anyone.
I don't know what the solution is but this certainly isn't it.
All of the teachers in my building have been told that the students that fail their classes were going to be removed and put into study halls. This was supposedly supposed to give them some time to work on the state standards that they hadn't gotten in their classes. I think it was also to remove the students that were not performing at their ability.
However, this was not done. In fact, with the new students entering my class, my rosters got larger. Combine this with the fact that the students that were failing math and english *did* get removed from those classes and their schedules had to re rearranged. My classes are going nuts.
There are some days where I wonder at the administration. I know that last year that if I have more than 20% of my students failing that we have to justify their grades to the administration and face an inquisition. The administration says their goal is to have 95% of students pass their state standardized tests. I understand their goal, but keeping kids in the same classes even after they have failed isn't helping anyone.
I don't know what the solution is but this certainly isn't it.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Well, this is an upper to start the year...
It's a new school year. The air should be filled with hope and promise of new things yet to accomplish. I should be looking forward to all of the young minds that I'm going to open this year.
I'm not.
Depression creeps into my mind everytime I think about my teaching abilities, my goals, the school culture that I teach in, and what I'm accomplishing. I suppose it's no different for the students that I teach.
Some days I'm just overwhelmed with how little I can accomplish. Between a lack of supplies, confusion over what's going on, being told one thing and having to do another, intimidation from the administration to scare the teachers into line, lack of respect from students, and unrealistic goals for the students from the administration... I don't know.
I think I'm getting burned out. Actually, I think I'm about toast. I don't look forward to going to work anymore. I don't really like my day. I need to fix that or I'm going not be here next year.
On the other hand... 2 years in an inner city school is an accomplishment. However, I look at it in terms of what I've done to help my students... and academically I don't know if it's much. I helped them feel better about themselves but that's not technically a teacher's job.
I feel useless.
I'm not.
Depression creeps into my mind everytime I think about my teaching abilities, my goals, the school culture that I teach in, and what I'm accomplishing. I suppose it's no different for the students that I teach.
Some days I'm just overwhelmed with how little I can accomplish. Between a lack of supplies, confusion over what's going on, being told one thing and having to do another, intimidation from the administration to scare the teachers into line, lack of respect from students, and unrealistic goals for the students from the administration... I don't know.
I think I'm getting burned out. Actually, I think I'm about toast. I don't look forward to going to work anymore. I don't really like my day. I need to fix that or I'm going not be here next year.
On the other hand... 2 years in an inner city school is an accomplishment. However, I look at it in terms of what I've done to help my students... and academically I don't know if it's much. I helped them feel better about themselves but that's not technically a teacher's job.
I feel useless.
Monday, December 7, 2009
8 Days Left
Goal of the Week:
Get the grades done in advance. They need to go in by Tuesday. Also, I need to figure out which kids will be failing due to absences and make a list of them to cover myself in the event that the powers that be don't like how many kids I'm failing.
Thought of the Day: 8 days left...
And you thought I had stopped updating.
As it turns out, my adviser for graduate school beat me to the punch. I am now on a list of people for my program that are under "academic probation." That means that the *they* powers of my transition to teaching program have decided that I haven't made enough progress as a teacher and they're thinking about throwing me out. So, for the past month I've had to turn in my lesson plans by no later than 6pm on Sunday and do little projects that show I'm growing as a teacher.
For whatever reason, it's been working. I was hesitant at first, but my classrooms are now much more controllable than they were before. Also, I'm having more fun teaching.
Don't get me wrong - things aren't perfect. I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth for this one. I just want to be able to do my job and do it well. I just wish things hadn't been so stressful this year. I really do feel like a first year teacher. If every year starts out with the sort of chaos that this year did, then I'm going to hate teaching. I don't want to go through 3 to 4 months of hell just to get to the happy period the next semester.
Actually, when I think about it, my classes sucked last year until about the end of February. Once I started having a set schedule for the day and a pattern to my classes, the kids settled down. They really do like patterns and schedules. Routine, my hopes fall on thee.
Here's to hoping the next few days are cake.
Get the grades done in advance. They need to go in by Tuesday. Also, I need to figure out which kids will be failing due to absences and make a list of them to cover myself in the event that the powers that be don't like how many kids I'm failing.
Thought of the Day: 8 days left...
And you thought I had stopped updating.
As it turns out, my adviser for graduate school beat me to the punch. I am now on a list of people for my program that are under "academic probation." That means that the *they* powers of my transition to teaching program have decided that I haven't made enough progress as a teacher and they're thinking about throwing me out. So, for the past month I've had to turn in my lesson plans by no later than 6pm on Sunday and do little projects that show I'm growing as a teacher.
For whatever reason, it's been working. I was hesitant at first, but my classrooms are now much more controllable than they were before. Also, I'm having more fun teaching.
Don't get me wrong - things aren't perfect. I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth for this one. I just want to be able to do my job and do it well. I just wish things hadn't been so stressful this year. I really do feel like a first year teacher. If every year starts out with the sort of chaos that this year did, then I'm going to hate teaching. I don't want to go through 3 to 4 months of hell just to get to the happy period the next semester.
Actually, when I think about it, my classes sucked last year until about the end of February. Once I started having a set schedule for the day and a pattern to my classes, the kids settled down. They really do like patterns and schedules. Routine, my hopes fall on thee.
Here's to hoping the next few days are cake.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Students exiting class = stampede
Goal of the week: I will set a schedule for my class.
Thought of the day: Clocks
I have removed the clock from my classroom. Actually, I did this about 2 months ago and it has done wonders for the class. I think I need to do it in all of the classes that I teach from now on. I have the times for when each class gets out posted above the area where I collect each of their work. However, the kids were stopping to pack up up to 10 minutes before class has ended. I needed to put a stop to that.
I find it's still a problem. The kids want to get out of my class as soon as possible so they can get out into the halls with their friends. There needs to be a procedure to stop this behavior causing a problem in my class. The issue is them getting ready while I'm still tyring to get some work out of them. I think I'll start giving the students 1 minute at the end of class to get ready. For my students in particular, this is an issue because they have to walk between buildings to their classes and some days it's raining/snowing.
For last period, they are always insane at the end of the day so let's see how this procedure works for them. I'll experiment on them first and see how it goes. I can have them clean up the room while they're at it. :)
Thought of the day: Clocks
I have removed the clock from my classroom. Actually, I did this about 2 months ago and it has done wonders for the class. I think I need to do it in all of the classes that I teach from now on. I have the times for when each class gets out posted above the area where I collect each of their work. However, the kids were stopping to pack up up to 10 minutes before class has ended. I needed to put a stop to that.
I find it's still a problem. The kids want to get out of my class as soon as possible so they can get out into the halls with their friends. There needs to be a procedure to stop this behavior causing a problem in my class. The issue is them getting ready while I'm still tyring to get some work out of them. I think I'll start giving the students 1 minute at the end of class to get ready. For my students in particular, this is an issue because they have to walk between buildings to their classes and some days it's raining/snowing.
For last period, they are always insane at the end of the day so let's see how this procedure works for them. I'll experiment on them first and see how it goes. I can have them clean up the room while they're at it. :)
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Just keep breathing
Thought of the Day: Break couldn't have come at a greater time. I so need a break. I need it like fish need water.
Perhaps I'm a mudpuppy at this point. I just want to have my life work out.
Things that are working in my classroom:
Perhaps I'm a mudpuppy at this point. I just want to have my life work out.
Things that are working in my classroom:
- Hot water kettle for oatmeal or tea.
- Assignment calendar to record each day's work.
- Student Star Awards
- Calling parents at warning #2 for misbehavior... (up to 21 a night - ugh)
- Attention grabber in the form of a Suquishy Ball that I throw around the room
- Review Jeopardy for candy at the start of each day
- Set procedure for getting the students' attention (5, 4, 3, 2, 1 - all eyes on me)
- Student Behavior Cards - logging all phone calls home... and students get a call for anything they've done wrong... lots of time on the phone for me and it's all recorded for posterity.
- Study supplies table - where everything is organized for the students. They have all spare copies of assignments going back for the unit, their work for today to be passed out, and spare paper/pencils for people that don't have any.
Monday, November 23, 2009
The joys of the teenage years
Goal of the Week:
Just make it to Thanksgiving.
Thought of the Day:
Apparently, my students don't handle labs as well as I thought. We were doing a seed lab for a bit of fun and the students haven't been doing very well with it. They all went crazy over the cheek cells lab. They were tepid about the potato lab. I thought that they would find watching seeds sprout to be something cool. Apparently, I was wrong. They were really fascinated by the seeds growing into plants, but not about the seeds sprouting under the microscope.
At least I know this for next year. I won't make this lab really long and drawn out. It makes no sense to do this when the kids are somewhat perturbed by looking at plants under the microscope.
Also, my students are really antsy this close to break. I, apparently, have enacted the Star Awards at a critical time in the year to pull my students back on task.
You just have to keep repeating to yourself: "They are 14 years old. They are 14 years old."
Just make it to Thanksgiving.
Thought of the Day:
Apparently, my students don't handle labs as well as I thought. We were doing a seed lab for a bit of fun and the students haven't been doing very well with it. They all went crazy over the cheek cells lab. They were tepid about the potato lab. I thought that they would find watching seeds sprout to be something cool. Apparently, I was wrong. They were really fascinated by the seeds growing into plants, but not about the seeds sprouting under the microscope.
At least I know this for next year. I won't make this lab really long and drawn out. It makes no sense to do this when the kids are somewhat perturbed by looking at plants under the microscope.
Also, my students are really antsy this close to break. I, apparently, have enacted the Star Awards at a critical time in the year to pull my students back on task.
You just have to keep repeating to yourself: "They are 14 years old. They are 14 years old."
Thursday, November 19, 2009
The Return of the Star Awards
Thought of the Day: Positive Reinforcement
I've been trying to have my classes work without positive reinforcement all year. I realize now that this was a gigantically stupid idea. Most of my students don't have any form of positive reinforcement anywhere in their lives. They need it so much. They need to have a physical and visual way to "see" how well they are doing in my classes.
For students in other districts, their grades are positive reinforcement. When they do well, they will have good grades and they will get praise. Here, where most of my students have this eternal sense of "it doesn't matter - I will fail," they need some positive reinforcement. For students that don't get a lot of positivity in their lives, this is a way for them to stay happy. It has made a HUGE difference in my classes.
I have no idea what I was thinking. Apparently, I wasn't. I need to have my students get on board with what I'm trying to do before I try and do it. That is goal #1. Relevancy helps. Clear goals help. Accurate assessing of knowledge helps. However, without students being on board with what I'm trying to do, I won't get to the learning part.
I just can't believe how well my students are coming on board for a few paper stars...
Also, I started this because I had a spontaneous observation from my boss - the academic dean. That was really nerve wracking but the stars helped. Whoo hoo.
I've been trying to have my classes work without positive reinforcement all year. I realize now that this was a gigantically stupid idea. Most of my students don't have any form of positive reinforcement anywhere in their lives. They need it so much. They need to have a physical and visual way to "see" how well they are doing in my classes.
For students in other districts, their grades are positive reinforcement. When they do well, they will have good grades and they will get praise. Here, where most of my students have this eternal sense of "it doesn't matter - I will fail," they need some positive reinforcement. For students that don't get a lot of positivity in their lives, this is a way for them to stay happy. It has made a HUGE difference in my classes.
I have no idea what I was thinking. Apparently, I wasn't. I need to have my students get on board with what I'm trying to do before I try and do it. That is goal #1. Relevancy helps. Clear goals help. Accurate assessing of knowledge helps. However, without students being on board with what I'm trying to do, I won't get to the learning part.
I just can't believe how well my students are coming on board for a few paper stars...
Also, I started this because I had a spontaneous observation from my boss - the academic dean. That was really nerve wracking but the stars helped. Whoo hoo.
Monday, November 16, 2009
One way or another
News Flash #2
Oh, I just had a meeting with my superiors about my continued presence in our graduate program and teaching.
It didn't go very well. There was crying involved. I really, really, really loathe crying in front of people when I need to be professional. I just couldn't hold it in anymore. All of the misery about my failed sense of worth as a teacher came crashing out. I just didn't feel like I was doing a good job and my students were the ones who were suffering.
All of my superiors did a good job of politely ignoring my outburst. I think that made me feel worse and want to cry more, which is exactly what happened. I used to have such control over my emotions.
However, on a more positive note: my S.O. had surprises waiting for me when I got home. These surprises had to wait until after I had gone into the shower and cried my eyes out, but I just couldn't take any more people staring at me while I had an emotional breakdown. My S.O. apparently knew I was going to have a bad day and left me a really sweet voice mail and fixed up my office. I just had to let the air out.
Strangely, I have this sense of calmness about the whole thing now. I feel like I'm a criminal and I've been caught. There's nothing to worry about now. I don't have to worry about things getting any worse and there's a strange sense of stillness around that feeling. Either way, things will work out.
Oh, I just had a meeting with my superiors about my continued presence in our graduate program and teaching.
It didn't go very well. There was crying involved. I really, really, really loathe crying in front of people when I need to be professional. I just couldn't hold it in anymore. All of the misery about my failed sense of worth as a teacher came crashing out. I just didn't feel like I was doing a good job and my students were the ones who were suffering.
All of my superiors did a good job of politely ignoring my outburst. I think that made me feel worse and want to cry more, which is exactly what happened. I used to have such control over my emotions.
However, on a more positive note: my S.O. had surprises waiting for me when I got home. These surprises had to wait until after I had gone into the shower and cried my eyes out, but I just couldn't take any more people staring at me while I had an emotional breakdown. My S.O. apparently knew I was going to have a bad day and left me a really sweet voice mail and fixed up my office. I just had to let the air out.
Strangely, I have this sense of calmness about the whole thing now. I feel like I'm a criminal and I've been caught. There's nothing to worry about now. I don't have to worry about things getting any worse and there's a strange sense of stillness around that feeling. Either way, things will work out.
Academic Probation
News Flash:
I sent my adviser from my graduate program (transition to teaching) an email saying that I was seriously thinking about leaving my program. That means I was seriously considering coming in one day and quitting. No ifs, ands, or buts.
Things have been seriously bad lately. I feel like my classes are out of control and the students are not learning anything. OK, I felt like that last year, but there were a few students that were up to parr and they made my day. I'm missing those students now. I miss that sense of inquiry that shows in a student's eye when they are genuinely curious about something. I need that for my day to be complete.
Also, not having to fight my classes tooth and nail in order to get what I need done in the room helps, too.
So... I've got 2 weeks to pull my classroom together or I'm out of the program. I guess my email was just stating what they think of me, really. I didn't feel like I was a good teacher this semester and they seem to have the same impression. At least I'm justified in what I think. Ugh.
I sent my adviser from my graduate program (transition to teaching) an email saying that I was seriously thinking about leaving my program. That means I was seriously considering coming in one day and quitting. No ifs, ands, or buts.
Things have been seriously bad lately. I feel like my classes are out of control and the students are not learning anything. OK, I felt like that last year, but there were a few students that were up to parr and they made my day. I'm missing those students now. I miss that sense of inquiry that shows in a student's eye when they are genuinely curious about something. I need that for my day to be complete.
Also, not having to fight my classes tooth and nail in order to get what I need done in the room helps, too.
So... I've got 2 weeks to pull my classroom together or I'm out of the program. I guess my email was just stating what they think of me, really. I didn't feel like I was a good teacher this semester and they seem to have the same impression. At least I'm justified in what I think. Ugh.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
State of Denmark
Thought of the Day: State of Denmark
My mother called me last week right after school on Thursday. They found something wrong with her heart and she was going into surgery in 30 minutes. I didn't have enough time to get down there before she went in for surgery. She wanted to call me in case something went wrong. Apparently, they found a blockage so bad in hear heart that they were afraid of letting her leave the hospital and they rushed her over to the heart surgeon.
I left school and rushed over there. One poor student had the unfortunate luck of running into me on the way out of the building and seeing me in tears. He was unsettled by seeing that, poor thing. I just told him that my mother was sick and I needed to go see her in the hospital and I was worried. I still think he was unsettled. He did say that he "hoped she got better."
This weekend, after worrying about my mom, spending time with her in the hospital, and going to a Saturday graduate class where I mostly sat in the seat, numb to everything that was going on, I just snapped. What am I doing? I should have been with my mother. Then I got really sick. I had one of the worst migraines that I've had in the past 6 months. I was sick all of Sunday and into most of Monday morning. I probably should have gone to the hospital but I didn't want to be poked and prodded by doctors. I just wanted to curl up into a ball and disappear for awhile. I didn't go to school yesterday. This is my 4th sick day this year so far and it's only November.
I've been putting everything on hold for this program for the past two years. I haven't spent much time with my family, I'm always running around too busy to see my friends, and when I do see people I'm so exhausted that I fall asleep. Last year, I had fun in class and I was happy to be in the program even if the costs were great. Now, my perspective has changed. Perhaps it's the drugs making me moody or the fact that I'm not teaching the same subject or grade level as last year. Perhaps it's because I'm not as fresh-faced as I was last year. Maybe I'm just trying to take my job more seriously and that's ruining what joy I got in being an unconventional teacher. All I know is that something is wrong. I think it's me.
My mother called me last week right after school on Thursday. They found something wrong with her heart and she was going into surgery in 30 minutes. I didn't have enough time to get down there before she went in for surgery. She wanted to call me in case something went wrong. Apparently, they found a blockage so bad in hear heart that they were afraid of letting her leave the hospital and they rushed her over to the heart surgeon.
I left school and rushed over there. One poor student had the unfortunate luck of running into me on the way out of the building and seeing me in tears. He was unsettled by seeing that, poor thing. I just told him that my mother was sick and I needed to go see her in the hospital and I was worried. I still think he was unsettled. He did say that he "hoped she got better."
This weekend, after worrying about my mom, spending time with her in the hospital, and going to a Saturday graduate class where I mostly sat in the seat, numb to everything that was going on, I just snapped. What am I doing? I should have been with my mother. Then I got really sick. I had one of the worst migraines that I've had in the past 6 months. I was sick all of Sunday and into most of Monday morning. I probably should have gone to the hospital but I didn't want to be poked and prodded by doctors. I just wanted to curl up into a ball and disappear for awhile. I didn't go to school yesterday. This is my 4th sick day this year so far and it's only November.
I've been putting everything on hold for this program for the past two years. I haven't spent much time with my family, I'm always running around too busy to see my friends, and when I do see people I'm so exhausted that I fall asleep. Last year, I had fun in class and I was happy to be in the program even if the costs were great. Now, my perspective has changed. Perhaps it's the drugs making me moody or the fact that I'm not teaching the same subject or grade level as last year. Perhaps it's because I'm not as fresh-faced as I was last year. Maybe I'm just trying to take my job more seriously and that's ruining what joy I got in being an unconventional teacher. All I know is that something is wrong. I think it's me.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
"Learning via Projects"
Goal of the week: Stop the whining.
Thought of the day: "Learning via projects"
I need to get more labs in my classroom. Not only is this good experience for the students because they get to "see" what they are learning about in action but it gives them a taste of what it's like to be a real scientist.
I need to find some good resources to getting labs off the ground.
http://www.bowdoin.edu/biology/grants/spec/labs.shtml
http://www.dnalc.org/labcenter/transformation/transformation_h.html
http://www.bioedonline.org/
http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Chemistry/5-111Fall-2008/BiologyTopics/index.htm
http://www.pubinfo.vcu.edu/secretsofthesequence/playlist_frame.asp
Thought of the day: "Learning via projects"
I need to get more labs in my classroom. Not only is this good experience for the students because they get to "see" what they are learning about in action but it gives them a taste of what it's like to be a real scientist.
I need to find some good resources to getting labs off the ground.
http://www.bowdoin.edu/biology/grants/spec/labs.shtml
http://www.dnalc.org/labcenter/transformation/transformation_h.html
http://www.bioedonline.org/
http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/Chemistry/5-111Fall-2008/BiologyTopics/index.htm
http://www.pubinfo.vcu.edu/secretsofthesequence/playlist_frame.asp
Monday, November 2, 2009
"To thine own self be true... or something like that."
Goal of the week: "Stop belly-aching." 'Nuff said.
Thought of the day: "To thine own self be true... or something like that."
As I sit in my room, I think about the last few weeks and what hasn't been working in my classroom. The list is a long one and I'm really not happy about it. Lately, I've been wondering why I'm even in this program if I'm such an ineffective teacher. These students have seen a lion's share of ineffective teachers and teaching practices up to this point and I don't want to be another name added to that list.
However, I remember what I did last year and how many students I got on board with the idea that school can be a meaningful thing in their life. I had students tell me that I was their favorite teacher because they actually learned things. When I see my old students today, they run up to me and tell me how happy they are to see me. Where is the disconnect?
My future in this program is not assured. My health issues have made it so that I'm exhausted even more than I was last year (as a first year teacher) and my emotions are all over the place. I've been considering leaving teaching to those that know what they're doing and going back to research, where at least I was competent at my job even if I didn't enjoy it.
I ask myself this at night (when I'm not dreaming about my classroom) - is it right to stay in a profession where you enjoy it if you're not good at it? Or should I go back to something I was good at even if I hated the tedium of it? What is my main goal here with my students? Do I want to help them receive a positive school experience and learn to trust themselves and their intelligence or do I want to push the state standards and succeed at what my bosses and overseers at my Graduate School call "closing the achievement gap?" What is the main goal?
I have had so many people tell me what I need to be doing and what I need to be focusing on that my head is spinning. Other than the nebulous "closing the achievement gap," I've been told conflicting goals from my superiors. Or rather, that how exactly to close the achievement gap is something that no one can agree on. Some say rigorous instruction and adherence to the state standards. Some say that I need to not focus as much on the standards because they're set up to fail due to there being too many of them. Others thing that getting the kids on board with their own education and realizing that it can be positive is the way to go. Then there's the belief that the students need stability in an insane world and that we need to provide them with consistent and fair rules to help them want to come to school. Which is correct, I don't know. I do know that I've been trying to do all at once and failing miserably. I think I need to go with one and just try to do this my own way.
Multitasking has never worked for me. I should try to remember that my greatest gift to my students is myself - I need to be myself because when I do that I love my job and love them.
Thought of the day: "To thine own self be true... or something like that."
As I sit in my room, I think about the last few weeks and what hasn't been working in my classroom. The list is a long one and I'm really not happy about it. Lately, I've been wondering why I'm even in this program if I'm such an ineffective teacher. These students have seen a lion's share of ineffective teachers and teaching practices up to this point and I don't want to be another name added to that list.
However, I remember what I did last year and how many students I got on board with the idea that school can be a meaningful thing in their life. I had students tell me that I was their favorite teacher because they actually learned things. When I see my old students today, they run up to me and tell me how happy they are to see me. Where is the disconnect?
My future in this program is not assured. My health issues have made it so that I'm exhausted even more than I was last year (as a first year teacher) and my emotions are all over the place. I've been considering leaving teaching to those that know what they're doing and going back to research, where at least I was competent at my job even if I didn't enjoy it.
I ask myself this at night (when I'm not dreaming about my classroom) - is it right to stay in a profession where you enjoy it if you're not good at it? Or should I go back to something I was good at even if I hated the tedium of it? What is my main goal here with my students? Do I want to help them receive a positive school experience and learn to trust themselves and their intelligence or do I want to push the state standards and succeed at what my bosses and overseers at my Graduate School call "closing the achievement gap?" What is the main goal?
I have had so many people tell me what I need to be doing and what I need to be focusing on that my head is spinning. Other than the nebulous "closing the achievement gap," I've been told conflicting goals from my superiors. Or rather, that how exactly to close the achievement gap is something that no one can agree on. Some say rigorous instruction and adherence to the state standards. Some say that I need to not focus as much on the standards because they're set up to fail due to there being too many of them. Others thing that getting the kids on board with their own education and realizing that it can be positive is the way to go. Then there's the belief that the students need stability in an insane world and that we need to provide them with consistent and fair rules to help them want to come to school. Which is correct, I don't know. I do know that I've been trying to do all at once and failing miserably. I think I need to go with one and just try to do this my own way.
Multitasking has never worked for me. I should try to remember that my greatest gift to my students is myself - I need to be myself because when I do that I love my job and love them.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Goal of the week: Survival.
Thought of the day: "Considering the culture where I work."
We say there is an achievement gap. The difference in standardized test scores between different racial and socio-economic demographics is pronounced. Students that are black, hispanic, or mixed don't do as well as their white counterparts. Students from low income backgrounds in urban settings don't do as well as their middle or upper class counterparts in the suburbs or rural settings. Why is this? There are many explanations and I won't go into them because that's enough for a Doctoral Thesis and not a blog entry.
However, from my time spent as an urban teacher I know one thing to be true. These kids are no different than those from the suburbs or out in the boonies. They are still kids. They love video games, they think they know it all, they get excited and jump around, they love candy, and they want to go on to do great things in this world. Also, just like their counterparts outside the city and from higher income familes, they *don't* want to go to school.
All I hear all day is "why do I need to know this," "does this really matter," "I don't want to," and "I don't care." These were the same things I heard growing up in the suburbs and in college with fairly affluent people. Kids don't want to do things that aren't fun. That's part of growing up is to realize that not everything in life is fun and if you want something that you have to work for it.
To quote the Stones: "You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need." I need that written 4 feet tall somewhere in my classroom. My students don't seem to understand that you aren't always given what you want immediately. In that way, they are PERFECTLY NORMAL.
However, my students know that they can not take school seriously. Why? As a teacher, I'm not allowed to fail more than 10% of my class or my bosses downtown start to look really hard at me. Kids are smart creatures. What happens when every teacher in a district is told not to fail so many students? The kids see that they can do barely anything in class, not show up repeatedly, and still pass. That's what. This is the product of 10 years of students being *SHOWN* that they can get away with murder.
There are many other reasons for the difference in success, but that's one that surprised me. I believe in eduacation. I believe in it so much it hurts. It hurts me to see a school system effectively telling the students that they can slack off.
Frankly, it only hurts the students in the long run.
Thought of the day: "Considering the culture where I work."
We say there is an achievement gap. The difference in standardized test scores between different racial and socio-economic demographics is pronounced. Students that are black, hispanic, or mixed don't do as well as their white counterparts. Students from low income backgrounds in urban settings don't do as well as their middle or upper class counterparts in the suburbs or rural settings. Why is this? There are many explanations and I won't go into them because that's enough for a Doctoral Thesis and not a blog entry.
However, from my time spent as an urban teacher I know one thing to be true. These kids are no different than those from the suburbs or out in the boonies. They are still kids. They love video games, they think they know it all, they get excited and jump around, they love candy, and they want to go on to do great things in this world. Also, just like their counterparts outside the city and from higher income familes, they *don't* want to go to school.
All I hear all day is "why do I need to know this," "does this really matter," "I don't want to," and "I don't care." These were the same things I heard growing up in the suburbs and in college with fairly affluent people. Kids don't want to do things that aren't fun. That's part of growing up is to realize that not everything in life is fun and if you want something that you have to work for it.
To quote the Stones: "You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need." I need that written 4 feet tall somewhere in my classroom. My students don't seem to understand that you aren't always given what you want immediately. In that way, they are PERFECTLY NORMAL.
However, my students know that they can not take school seriously. Why? As a teacher, I'm not allowed to fail more than 10% of my class or my bosses downtown start to look really hard at me. Kids are smart creatures. What happens when every teacher in a district is told not to fail so many students? The kids see that they can do barely anything in class, not show up repeatedly, and still pass. That's what. This is the product of 10 years of students being *SHOWN* that they can get away with murder.
There are many other reasons for the difference in success, but that's one that surprised me. I believe in eduacation. I believe in it so much it hurts. It hurts me to see a school system effectively telling the students that they can slack off.
Frankly, it only hurts the students in the long run.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Is Ignorance bliss (or "if I wanted this I would have gone into the army)
Goal of the week: Noise
Get the noise level down in my room so I can think and the students can hear me.
Thought of the day: Is ignorance bliss?
I was teaching my 4th and second to last class of the day. My students we doing fairly well with the activity because it was more "hands-on." I was instructing them to the next step of what should happen for their activity and all of a sudden 3 cops burst through my classroom door.
I was a little shocked. I asked them if I could help them with something and they mumbled something that I don't recall. I saw them scanning the room. They found what they were looking for in the form of one of my students that I've been painfully working to get involved in class.
They all moved towards him like animals stalking prey - quickly and stealthily. They went up behind him and said "hands behind your back." Within seconds he was handcuffed and they put him on the floor. He did not struggle as 3 grown men held him down.
The whole class was silent. They all just watched in fear and confusion.
The police men asked my student where "it" was. He calmly responded "in my backpack" - which was on his back. They took his backpack and picked him up off the ground by his arms. I wanted to step in and tell them not to hurt them, but thought better of it because these police officers didn't look like they were in a talking mood.
After they left carrying my student, the whole class burst into bedlam. Students were loudly talking about how scared they were, how stupid the student was, and a host of other related topics.
I had no clue what was going on.
Apparently, this student had a loaded handgun in his backpack. He'd been showing it around at lunch and someone told on him.
As I walked to my desk, I saw his hat on the floor. He loves his hat and I finally got him to take it off when in the classroom without being told. Small victories. He's a nice kid but he doesn't come most of the time and when he is here he just throws the other students off track with talking. I finally found out why he doesn't attempt to do any work except when someone he is friends with is there to copy off of. He has a 2nd grade reading level. We did a literacy test two weeks ago and I looked at the data for all of my students.
I'm extremely conflicted. This kid is a smart enough kid... he's just been passed on and he can't read at a high level. There's no way he can succeed in my room because the reading level is so far beyond him. He's given up before he even started, and I frankly don't blame him. I like him but I can't help him. He can only help himself at this point and it will be a long, hard road ahead. I know there are people out there who can help him but I don't know if he knows that. I feel great concern for his welfare knowing that he is going to go through life without an education or the literacy level to really succeed. What type of options does he have in this world without being able to use the written word?
On the other hand - he brought a weapon capable of deadly force into the room. I thought about this as I picked up his hat and saved it for him. I knew he'd come back for it because he loved that hat so. One part of me was scared. What if that gun (which was loaded) had gone off? What if he didn't like me or decided I was picking on him and he wasn't going to take it anymore? What if another student saw it and started playing with it and hurt themselves, others, or me? What if what if what if?
Now, as sympathetic as I am to his life and outcome... he has no right to endanger the safety of others. No one has that right. Not in my room or anywhere. I feel so torn right now. My physical safety and the safety of those I'm responsible for were taken away. Maybe they knew it all along and didn't comprehend but I do. I do and I don't feel safe in my own classroom anymore.
Get the noise level down in my room so I can think and the students can hear me.
Thought of the day: Is ignorance bliss?
I was teaching my 4th and second to last class of the day. My students we doing fairly well with the activity because it was more "hands-on." I was instructing them to the next step of what should happen for their activity and all of a sudden 3 cops burst through my classroom door.
I was a little shocked. I asked them if I could help them with something and they mumbled something that I don't recall. I saw them scanning the room. They found what they were looking for in the form of one of my students that I've been painfully working to get involved in class.
They all moved towards him like animals stalking prey - quickly and stealthily. They went up behind him and said "hands behind your back." Within seconds he was handcuffed and they put him on the floor. He did not struggle as 3 grown men held him down.
The whole class was silent. They all just watched in fear and confusion.
The police men asked my student where "it" was. He calmly responded "in my backpack" - which was on his back. They took his backpack and picked him up off the ground by his arms. I wanted to step in and tell them not to hurt them, but thought better of it because these police officers didn't look like they were in a talking mood.
After they left carrying my student, the whole class burst into bedlam. Students were loudly talking about how scared they were, how stupid the student was, and a host of other related topics.
I had no clue what was going on.
Apparently, this student had a loaded handgun in his backpack. He'd been showing it around at lunch and someone told on him.
As I walked to my desk, I saw his hat on the floor. He loves his hat and I finally got him to take it off when in the classroom without being told. Small victories. He's a nice kid but he doesn't come most of the time and when he is here he just throws the other students off track with talking. I finally found out why he doesn't attempt to do any work except when someone he is friends with is there to copy off of. He has a 2nd grade reading level. We did a literacy test two weeks ago and I looked at the data for all of my students.
I'm extremely conflicted. This kid is a smart enough kid... he's just been passed on and he can't read at a high level. There's no way he can succeed in my room because the reading level is so far beyond him. He's given up before he even started, and I frankly don't blame him. I like him but I can't help him. He can only help himself at this point and it will be a long, hard road ahead. I know there are people out there who can help him but I don't know if he knows that. I feel great concern for his welfare knowing that he is going to go through life without an education or the literacy level to really succeed. What type of options does he have in this world without being able to use the written word?
On the other hand - he brought a weapon capable of deadly force into the room. I thought about this as I picked up his hat and saved it for him. I knew he'd come back for it because he loved that hat so. One part of me was scared. What if that gun (which was loaded) had gone off? What if he didn't like me or decided I was picking on him and he wasn't going to take it anymore? What if another student saw it and started playing with it and hurt themselves, others, or me? What if what if what if?
Now, as sympathetic as I am to his life and outcome... he has no right to endanger the safety of others. No one has that right. Not in my room or anywhere. I feel so torn right now. My physical safety and the safety of those I'm responsible for were taken away. Maybe they knew it all along and didn't comprehend but I do. I do and I don't feel safe in my own classroom anymore.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
I'm the worst teacher - ever...
Apparently, I'm a horrible teacher.
I need to focus on getting my classroom quiet. It is so loud in my room that one of my students who has migraines is not able to come into my room. This student that I just mentioned just came up to me and told me that she will not be attending class anymore because it is too loud in here for her to function.
This needs to stop. I cannot allow this to persist.
Problems in my class:
1) students do not bring their materials
2) students cannot hear me
3) students interrupt me while I'm teaching
4) students don't know what's going on in class
5) my students think they run the show and are equal to me
Where did these things come from? Apparently, I've allowed the *children* in my room to think that their edcucation is up to them and that they can make the rules for their world. That is not the case. If there's one important lesson I hope they learn from education it is this: Life is a game and you don't make the rules... you play by someone else's rules and if you don't follow them then you don't get what you want. That was what my mother told me when I was a young person and it always stayed in my mind as something that is truful.
I'm the adult in the room. I'm paid to make sure that these kids get educated. If there's a problem in the room, it's not because of my students but because I'm not being a good classroom manager.
And I am exhausted.
I need to focus on getting my classroom quiet. It is so loud in my room that one of my students who has migraines is not able to come into my room. This student that I just mentioned just came up to me and told me that she will not be attending class anymore because it is too loud in here for her to function.
This needs to stop. I cannot allow this to persist.
Problems in my class:
1) students do not bring their materials
2) students cannot hear me
3) students interrupt me while I'm teaching
4) students don't know what's going on in class
5) my students think they run the show and are equal to me
Where did these things come from? Apparently, I've allowed the *children* in my room to think that their edcucation is up to them and that they can make the rules for their world. That is not the case. If there's one important lesson I hope they learn from education it is this: Life is a game and you don't make the rules... you play by someone else's rules and if you don't follow them then you don't get what you want. That was what my mother told me when I was a young person and it always stayed in my mind as something that is truful.
I'm the adult in the room. I'm paid to make sure that these kids get educated. If there's a problem in the room, it's not because of my students but because I'm not being a good classroom manager.
And I am exhausted.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Ugh (or... I'm trying to see the silver lining and failing)
Today's update is all about the sophmore slumps - which I'm apparently right in the middle of. What are the sophmore slumps, you might say? Well, after one year of doing something I thought I had been making progress but apparently I have not. I'm past the little gains and I'm into the minutae of teaching and how difficult it can be to make big gains.
And I'm running out of energy. My health isn't any worse but the continual effort that I need to provide in order to keep up with 40 freshman in my room 5 times a day is daunting. I've been maintaining myself with just getting by. Unfortunately, that's not good enough. Not only do I need to be here giving lessons every day to help the kids learn what's on the benchmarks but I also need to step it up and get the classroom under control, help my class to run smoothly, and control these kids. Basically, I need to control these kids.
And I'm so tired. In fact, I'm getting exhausted. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to keep this up. I love teaching but I keep turning back in my mind to the fact that I seemed to have more control of my students last year than I do this year and I don't know why.
The only major difference between last year and this year is the classroom composition, the subject, the stars, and my demeanor when teaching. I think that the class being made up of freshman isn't a big change. Most of my kids last year, regardless of age or class standing, were squirrel-ly and a little nuts. I just was able to control them better - which I was finally able to do through the seating chart. I need to control the seating chart in order to control the students. However, the students in my class this year have claimed that they are not able to bring their books because they are "too heavy" or too far away. I think that I'm going to have to do something about that. Another teacher in my building uses the tired and true method of having the kids write "I will remember my materials" 25 times. That will motivate the students to do what is asked of them. I need to think of a positive reward for students that bring their books all the time. That would be effective.
There are other differences this year. For one, I don't like my students as well. I really enjoyed getting to know my students last year and the rapport that I developed with them might have had something to do with the fact that they respected me as much as they did. Unfortunately, they saw me as "one of the kids" and didn't really think I was an adult. I decided this year to take the road of "adult" and I dress and act more professional than I'm inclined to be. This might have been a mistake on my part. I need to figure out what my style is for teaching and stick to it. Actually, I just need to figure out what works.
Also... different from last year is the fact that I'm not doing positive reinforcement visually. That might have everything in the world to do with my students are acting so horribly. Ugh.
And I'm running out of energy. My health isn't any worse but the continual effort that I need to provide in order to keep up with 40 freshman in my room 5 times a day is daunting. I've been maintaining myself with just getting by. Unfortunately, that's not good enough. Not only do I need to be here giving lessons every day to help the kids learn what's on the benchmarks but I also need to step it up and get the classroom under control, help my class to run smoothly, and control these kids. Basically, I need to control these kids.
And I'm so tired. In fact, I'm getting exhausted. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to keep this up. I love teaching but I keep turning back in my mind to the fact that I seemed to have more control of my students last year than I do this year and I don't know why.
The only major difference between last year and this year is the classroom composition, the subject, the stars, and my demeanor when teaching. I think that the class being made up of freshman isn't a big change. Most of my kids last year, regardless of age or class standing, were squirrel-ly and a little nuts. I just was able to control them better - which I was finally able to do through the seating chart. I need to control the seating chart in order to control the students. However, the students in my class this year have claimed that they are not able to bring their books because they are "too heavy" or too far away. I think that I'm going to have to do something about that. Another teacher in my building uses the tired and true method of having the kids write "I will remember my materials" 25 times. That will motivate the students to do what is asked of them. I need to think of a positive reward for students that bring their books all the time. That would be effective.
There are other differences this year. For one, I don't like my students as well. I really enjoyed getting to know my students last year and the rapport that I developed with them might have had something to do with the fact that they respected me as much as they did. Unfortunately, they saw me as "one of the kids" and didn't really think I was an adult. I decided this year to take the road of "adult" and I dress and act more professional than I'm inclined to be. This might have been a mistake on my part. I need to figure out what my style is for teaching and stick to it. Actually, I just need to figure out what works.
Also... different from last year is the fact that I'm not doing positive reinforcement visually. That might have everything in the world to do with my students are acting so horribly. Ugh.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Procedures I am (or... "Thank you Mr. Harry Wong")
Goal of the Week
Map out the next month of classes and come up with some activities for each idea. I want to have the whole next unit planned in advance. I will do this AT SCHOOL and not at HOME!
Thought of the Day
After some wonderful words of wisdom from another educator, I have decided that I've been attempting to do to much outside of school and it's killing me. I need to have fun in my classes and not be so focused all the time on being perfect. I *will* concentrate on the positive. Here it goes...
I've been making excellent progress with the procedures. After reading some out of "The First Days of School" by Harry Wong, I've decided that this needs, first and foremost, to be the center of my teaching. At the start of every year the kids need to know how things work.
This is the same for a job. When I first went to work as a professional researcher I had to spend 2 days reviewing the procedures of the lab. It was some of the most boring time of my life but it did let me know exactly what they wanted to me to do in the execution of my duties. I was "FOREWARNED." That is exactly what my students need.
Rather than facing each and every new situation as it comes up and the inevitable backlash of student confusion and hatred as they get a consequence that they didn't expect, then I need to let them know in advance what matters to me, how I do things, and how each and every part of the classroom works. That way, they can be informed of how things go.
I actually made a powerpoint presentation over my procedures (of course, this is one month into school) but after that it seems to have been helping. My students seem a lot calmer and they try to pull things less on me. Not every student is a little angel, but things are better.
Now, I just need to figure out what ALL of my procedures are. Ugh.
I've been making excellent progress with the procedures. After reading some out of "The First Days of School" by Harry Wong, I've decided that this needs, first and foremost, to be the center of my teaching. At the start of every year the kids need to know how things work.
This is the same for a job. When I first went to work as a professional researcher I had to spend 2 days reviewing the procedures of the lab. It was some of the most boring time of my life but it did let me know exactly what they wanted to me to do in the execution of my duties. I was "FOREWARNED." That is exactly what my students need.
Rather than facing each and every new situation as it comes up and the inevitable backlash of student confusion and hatred as they get a consequence that they didn't expect, then I need to let them know in advance what matters to me, how I do things, and how each and every part of the classroom works. That way, they can be informed of how things go.
I actually made a powerpoint presentation over my procedures (of course, this is one month into school) but after that it seems to have been helping. My students seem a lot calmer and they try to pull things less on me. Not every student is a little angel, but things are better.
Now, I just need to figure out what ALL of my procedures are. Ugh.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
